Monday, November 24, 2008
The Cliche Adventures of "This Guy"
This is a project that came into my store the other day. I was so angry because there was FOUR HOURS of this. I repeat FOUR HOURS!!!!!! Now that i've had a chance to chill out and actually watch it, I don't know how i could have lived without this........ Thank goodness for the purple candy store.
Friday, August 8, 2008
Monday, August 4, 2008
The Cliche Adventures of MAtt Milstead #6
This comic is more for my entertainment than anything else.....
Friday, August 1, 2008
The Cliche Adventures of MAtt Milstead #4
I've been editing way too many Islamic radicalism videos.....
Wednesday, July 30, 2008
The Cliche Adventures of MAtt Milstead #3
In case you don't know.......Willow totally becomes a
lesbian in season 4.
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
Monday, July 28, 2008
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Just Call Me Porky
I realized today that i am subconsciously stressed about this project at work. Although my mood hasn't changed much from the whiny, self centered person i am, i've found that i've started eating......a lot.
I came to this conclusion when i realized i was gaining weight. I could feel the weight of my body becoming heavier and heavier with every chick fil a chicken sandwich i'd inhale. Not to mention i can't even see an ab anymore, i used to have at least a two pack.
Why am i stress eating you ask? I was sitting at my desk yesterday, dreading working on this on going project, and realized, "wow, for the first time in seven months, i could totally go for a cigarette." When i would work late nights editing years ago, cigarettes were the only thing that would keep me awake.
So now that i've quit smoking, i substituted that oral fixation with another....eating. This would
be fine with me if eating had the same effect as smoking. You know, keeping me awake, making me feel comforted and safe, and most importantly taking away the stress like a your sock soaks up dog urine off the kitchen floor, (come on it's all happened to us) but unfortunately it doesn't. It just makes me more tired. So i eat to stay awake, and it makes me more tired. It's a vicious cycle of sleepiness and weight gain.
So i'm gonna start working out again......or become anorexic...........next week.
I came to this conclusion when i realized i was gaining weight. I could feel the weight of my body becoming heavier and heavier with every chick fil a chicken sandwich i'd inhale. Not to mention i can't even see an ab anymore, i used to have at least a two pack.
Why am i stress eating you ask? I was sitting at my desk yesterday, dreading working on this on going project, and realized, "wow, for the first time in seven months, i could totally go for a cigarette." When i would work late nights editing years ago, cigarettes were the only thing that would keep me awake.
So now that i've quit smoking, i substituted that oral fixation with another....eating. This would
be fine with me if eating had the same effect as smoking. You know, keeping me awake, making me feel comforted and safe, and most importantly taking away the stress like a your sock soaks up dog urine off the kitchen floor, (come on it's all happened to us) but unfortunately it doesn't. It just makes me more tired. So i eat to stay awake, and it makes me more tired. It's a vicious cycle of sleepiness and weight gain.
So i'm gonna start working out again......or become anorexic...........next week.
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
I had a good title for this blog, but i started writing the blog and forgot it. Thanks Islam for making me tired.
So I've been doing work with the FBI over the past month. They've hired us to help them with a court case against an Islamic group that helps to fund the Hamas and other terrorist groups in Palestine, through a "charity" that also helps orphaned children who's parents have martyred themselves. Then they raise the children to become the new martyrs.
When initially handed this project, i was excited about it. I mean come on, the FBI! How many opportunities does a person get to work side by side with our governments most secret organization? It's like working with Mulder and Skully, solving the mysteries of the Qur'an. So i took the job and ran with it.
One month later, and we're only half way done with the project. Oh by the way, the due date is Friday........morning. So i've spent the last two days working 14 hours each day.
Now please don't misunderstand, i don't mind working late hours, i love my job, and the project is easy. There is just so much of it, and it's incredibly draining.
Imagine if you can hearing for 14 hours a day, in Arabic, that the blood of the martyr is honored by God higher than anything else in existence. Death, killing, brain washing, greed and money. It's awful. I am so emotionally and physically drained by the end of my work day i can barely stay awake, and then once i get to sleep all my dreams are in Arabic. I keep hearing "Duckville" (which is what, "Say God is Great", sounds like in Arabic), then "Allah Akbar," which is God is Great in Arabic.
This project has made me appreciate my own faith more and more, and very thankful that we have prophets on this earth today to help guide us away from paths like that.
When initially handed this project, i was excited about it. I mean come on, the FBI! How many opportunities does a person get to work side by side with our governments most secret organization? It's like working with Mulder and Skully, solving the mysteries of the Qur'an. So i took the job and ran with it.
One month later, and we're only half way done with the project. Oh by the way, the due date is Friday........morning. So i've spent the last two days working 14 hours each day.
Now please don't misunderstand, i don't mind working late hours, i love my job, and the project is easy. There is just so much of it, and it's incredibly draining.
Imagine if you can hearing for 14 hours a day, in Arabic, that the blood of the martyr is honored by God higher than anything else in existence. Death, killing, brain washing, greed and money. It's awful. I am so emotionally and physically drained by the end of my work day i can barely stay awake, and then once i get to sleep all my dreams are in Arabic. I keep hearing "Duckville" (which is what, "Say God is Great", sounds like in Arabic), then "Allah Akbar," which is God is Great in Arabic.
This project has made me appreciate my own faith more and more, and very thankful that we have prophets on this earth today to help guide us away from paths like that.
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
Harry and the Potters!
So i have officially seen the majesty that is wizard rock live. If was one of the coolest, if not THE COOLEST, shows i've ever been to. It was nice knowing that i was in company of people who shared a common interest......that and Math the Band was amazing! Thanks Amy for going with me, and don't forget, Hagrid gives great big hugs, Hagrid is full of love, just don't get caught here, in Hagrids beard. AHHHHHHHH!
Saturday, July 5, 2008
Welcome to my blog, I hate Rivers Cumo; A Rope of Sand
As of tonight i've tried, unsuccessfully, reading and playing music. I gave up on those and decided i would give writing a try.
I've determined after quite a bit of thought that i need another blog. I've been reading so much lately that i feel i may be a better writer than i had been six months ago. Sooooooo.....
Here we are. This is my blog. A few rules if you are making the tough decision to embark into the mind of Matt Milstead.
1. I will piss you off eventually, so be prepared.
Thats about it, just thought you should be ready for that day, and yes i do realize the grammatical error of me writing, "a few rules" and there only being one. All apart of the humor, try and keep up.
I've tried starting this blog five or six times already. With this being my first publicized entry, I'm trying to determine what kind of mood to set for the rest of the blogs i post. I like to laugh, but i can't write funny. I learned that at the age of 17 when trying out a career as a stand up comic. My only good joke was, "My names Matt and I want to be a stand up comedian. (then when the audience doesn't laugh i would say) Hmm, that joke goes over really well when i tell my girlfriends parents" One word LAME. I could be serious but i don't want to be too emo for my own good. And i would like to have people want to come back and read my blog, not slit their wrists after reading. (note to self: add emo to my computer's dictionary, so as to not get that red squiggly line)(done) Or, I could just give shout outs to people i know, or bands that influenced me, oh wait Rivers Cumo already did that on his new album. And.......i think we have our blog subject.
Welcome to my Blog, I Hate Rivers Cumo:
I was driving home from church one night, and just so happened to switch the radio station from my regular, classical radio station, to the "alternative rock" station that Dallas offers. (by the way i use quotations on the words "alternative rock" because Dallas radio sucks, and the only reason they call it alternative rock, is because it's the only rock station around so you have no other alternative) I just so happen to switch it right in time to hear the new Weezer track "Pork and Beans", along with an interesting introduction about the song.
Heres what the introduction said: (by the way i'm paraphrasing) Rivers Cumo was asked by his record company to write a song that was catchy and would sell really well. In response to that he wrote the song "Pork and Beans". The chorus is as follows:
I'mma do the things
That I wanna do
I ain't got a thing
To prove to you
I'll eat my candy
With the pork and beans
Excuse my manners
If I make a scene
I ain't gonna wear
The clothes that you like
I'm finally dandy
With the me inside
One look in the mirror
And I'm tickled pink
I don't give a hoot
About what you think
So he wrote a song about not wanting to do what they want, yet he did exactly what they wanted. Way to go dude, way to stick it to them by writing an incredibly poppy song about not selling out, and yet you sold out to do it. If you really wanted to stick it to the record executives why didn't you just release the album for download yourself, like Radiohead did. They practically gave their album away, and all the money went straight to them. Not to mention they were one of the top five albums on the Billboard music charts for several weeks running.
Now i will admit, when i first heard this song i liked it, it sounded like something off of the Blue Album, and it gave me unnecessarily high hopes for the newer Red Album. So, i downloaded it, and man was i pissed. I got suckered into getting another crappy album by Weezer. Damn you Rivers Cumo!
I should have known. I haven't heard anything good from Weezer in over 10 years, why would i expect anything different. I think deep down inside i love the Blue Album and Pinkerton so much that i just hoped that he would have lost everything he learned from Harvard and his voice lessons, and brought it back to the classic Weezer sound.
If you need an example of why this album should be burned and never spoken of again, listen to track two, "The Greatest Man That Ever Lived (Variations on a Shaker Hymn)." This would be a great track if it wasn't so big-headed, self centered and had a crappy rap at the beginning. Honestly i'm thinking about editing the rap out of the beginning and sending it to Rivers with a letter that says, this is how it should sound, jackass.
There was a large part of me that knew that this was going to be another vomit-inducing album, so thats why i just downloaded it off the interweb. I never actually paid for it, and am very happy i didn't. Rivers Cumo is the reason that downloading music should not be illegal. I only want to pay for albums that are good. So thanks Rivers, i will never buy another Weezer album as long as i live. And by the way, shave your mustache you look like a douche.
I've determined after quite a bit of thought that i need another blog. I've been reading so much lately that i feel i may be a better writer than i had been six months ago. Sooooooo.....
Here we are. This is my blog. A few rules if you are making the tough decision to embark into the mind of Matt Milstead.
1. I will piss you off eventually, so be prepared.
Thats about it, just thought you should be ready for that day, and yes i do realize the grammatical error of me writing, "a few rules" and there only being one. All apart of the humor, try and keep up.
I've tried starting this blog five or six times already. With this being my first publicized entry, I'm trying to determine what kind of mood to set for the rest of the blogs i post. I like to laugh, but i can't write funny. I learned that at the age of 17 when trying out a career as a stand up comic. My only good joke was, "My names Matt and I want to be a stand up comedian. (then when the audience doesn't laugh i would say) Hmm, that joke goes over really well when i tell my girlfriends parents" One word LAME. I could be serious but i don't want to be too emo for my own good. And i would like to have people want to come back and read my blog, not slit their wrists after reading. (note to self: add emo to my computer's dictionary, so as to not get that red squiggly line)(done) Or, I could just give shout outs to people i know, or bands that influenced me, oh wait Rivers Cumo already did that on his new album. And.......i think we have our blog subject.
Welcome to my Blog, I Hate Rivers Cumo:
I was driving home from church one night, and just so happened to switch the radio station from my regular, classical radio station, to the "alternative rock" station that Dallas offers. (by the way i use quotations on the words "alternative rock" because Dallas radio sucks, and the only reason they call it alternative rock, is because it's the only rock station around so you have no other alternative) I just so happen to switch it right in time to hear the new Weezer track "Pork and Beans", along with an interesting introduction about the song.
Heres what the introduction said: (by the way i'm paraphrasing) Rivers Cumo was asked by his record company to write a song that was catchy and would sell really well. In response to that he wrote the song "Pork and Beans". The chorus is as follows:
I'mma do the things
That I wanna do
I ain't got a thing
To prove to you
I'll eat my candy
With the pork and beans
Excuse my manners
If I make a scene
I ain't gonna wear
The clothes that you like
I'm finally dandy
With the me inside
One look in the mirror
And I'm tickled pink
I don't give a hoot
About what you think
So he wrote a song about not wanting to do what they want, yet he did exactly what they wanted. Way to go dude, way to stick it to them by writing an incredibly poppy song about not selling out, and yet you sold out to do it. If you really wanted to stick it to the record executives why didn't you just release the album for download yourself, like Radiohead did. They practically gave their album away, and all the money went straight to them. Not to mention they were one of the top five albums on the Billboard music charts for several weeks running.
Now i will admit, when i first heard this song i liked it, it sounded like something off of the Blue Album, and it gave me unnecessarily high hopes for the newer Red Album. So, i downloaded it, and man was i pissed. I got suckered into getting another crappy album by Weezer. Damn you Rivers Cumo!
I should have known. I haven't heard anything good from Weezer in over 10 years, why would i expect anything different. I think deep down inside i love the Blue Album and Pinkerton so much that i just hoped that he would have lost everything he learned from Harvard and his voice lessons, and brought it back to the classic Weezer sound.
If you need an example of why this album should be burned and never spoken of again, listen to track two, "The Greatest Man That Ever Lived (Variations on a Shaker Hymn)." This would be a great track if it wasn't so big-headed, self centered and had a crappy rap at the beginning. Honestly i'm thinking about editing the rap out of the beginning and sending it to Rivers with a letter that says, this is how it should sound, jackass.
There was a large part of me that knew that this was going to be another vomit-inducing album, so thats why i just downloaded it off the interweb. I never actually paid for it, and am very happy i didn't. Rivers Cumo is the reason that downloading music should not be illegal. I only want to pay for albums that are good. So thanks Rivers, i will never buy another Weezer album as long as i live. And by the way, shave your mustache you look like a douche.
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